I came across this blog post concerning a lost camera and the effort to get it back. It’s worth a read (until the end) but I’ll summarize by saying that the owner of the camera got completely screwed by the people who found it. I found this interesting because I have my own lost-and-found story that had similar results.

And just as clarification on the title of this post, I do hate people. I tend to like individuals but I’m consistently disappointed and annoyed by humanity in general.

My story is a bit of a twist on the “lost camera” story because I didn’t lose anything. I actually found something. It was a purse. I was leaving a retail store with my purchases and found a purse in a cart near my car. The cart and the purse had been there the entire time, I just didn’t notice until I left the store. I did what I thought was right and took it to the customer service counter.

I explained the situation, that someone has lost her purse, and handed the purse over to the guy at the counter. He took it and immediately reached for the wallet to see if there was any money. That’s when he noticed that I hadn’t left yet. I didn’t feel right about leaving the purse with this goon (Really, right in front of me at the counter? Couldn’t he have taken it to the break room or something before rifling through her purse?) so I took the purse and the wallet back. He protested but I threatened to talk to his manager. I should have, but I was in a bit of a hurry at this time and didn’t want another party involved. I left my information in case the woman came back for her purse or the customer service goon wanted to rob my house.

When I got home, I looked through the purse for anything that I could use to identify the owner. I don’t remember how much money there was in the purse, but I do remember that it was only a few singles and change. There were, however, lots of credit card receipts made that morning. The woman drove off without her purse hours before I got to it. I also found that she lived in the next state over after piecing together lots of tidbits of information found in the wallet (no driver’s license). She lived something like 70-80 miles or so away. This isn’t unreasonable because where I lived was on one of the main interstate lines and people often stop there for a meal or just to get out of the car if they’ve driven to my state’s capital. This meant that getting the purse back to her could be a bitch. It was.

I located a number for this woman using the might internet and gave her a call that same evening. She answered and I explained the situation, that I had found her purse and that I was looking to return it to her. She demanded that I drive it to her. She didn’t ask, she demanded. I refused and she became belligerent, cussing and yelling at me over the phone. Then she hung up. Hanging up on the guy that’s holding your purse is probably not a good idea.

Later that night, her husband called back. Apparently they had caller ID. He was very kind and apologetic about his wife and asked if there was anything we could work out. His wife was unwilling to be helpful and he and I both had places to be for the next week or so. The best he could offer is to drive halfway to pick it up but I was still pissed at his wife (especially since he indicated that she could drive to get it but refused) and did not feel like driving 30-40 miles out of my way. I offered to mail it to them. He hung up.

The next day, I mailed the damn purse. Just so they didn’t say I did them wrong, I even paid postage. She got the purse exactly as I found it, wadded up credit card receipts and all. I sent it as cheaply as I could, however, and always hoped it got lost in the mail. I haven’t heard from them since so I figure the matter is settled. I still think the husband should be punched and the wife beaten mercilessly with a rubber hose, but there’s no justice in the universe so I’m not holding my breath over it.

This was neither the first time nor the last time I hated people, but it was definitely a hallmark event.